"SteveH"
Usenet Poster
steve.houghREMOVE@MEblueyonder.co.uk
Posted on:
Nov 9, 2007, 7:01 AM
Post #7 of 9
(54 views)
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Crash Lander wrote:
> WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY...
>
> LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY AND I DIDN'T FEEL VERY WELL WAKING UP THAT
> MORNING.
>
> I WENT DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST HOPING MY WIFE WOULD BE PLEASANT AND
> SAY, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!", AND POSSIBLY HAVE A PRESENT FOR ME.
>
> AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE BARELY SAID GOOD MORNING, LET ALONE "HAPPY
> BIRTHDAY."
>
> I THOUGHT... WELL, THAT'S MARRIAGE FOR YOU, BUT THE KIDS WILL
> REMEMBER.
> MY KIDS CAME INTO BREAKFAST AND DIDN'T SAY A WORD. SO WHEN I LEFT FOR
> THE OFFICE, I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOW AND SOMEWHAT DESPONDENT.
>
> AS I WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, MY SECRETARY JANE SAID, "GOOD MORNING,
> BOSS, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"
>
> IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER THAT AT LEAST SOMEONE HAD REMEMBERED.
>
> I WORKED UNTIL ONE O'CLOCK AND THEN JANE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR AND SAID,
> "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY OUTSIDE, AND IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY,
> LET'S GO OUT TO LUNCH, JUST YOU AND ME."
>
> I SAID, "THANKS JANE, THAT'S THE GREATEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY.
> LET'S
> GO!"
>
> WE WENT TO LUNCH. BUT WE DIDN'T GO WHERE WE NORMALLY WOULD GO.
>
> WE DINED INSTEAD AT A LITTLE PLACE WITH A PRIVATE TABLE. WE HAD TWO
> MARTINIS EACH AND I ENJOYED THE MEAL TREMENDOUSLY ON THE WAY BACK TO
> THE OFFICE, JANE SAID, "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY... WE
> DON'T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE OFFICE, DO WE?"
>
> I RESPONDED, "I GUESS NOT. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND?"
>
> SHE SAID, "LET'S GO TO MY APARTMENT."
>
> AFTER ARRIVING AT HER APARTMENT JANE TURNED TO ME AND SAID, "BOSS, IF
> YOU DON'T MIND, I'M GOING TO STEP INTO THE BEDROOM FOR A MOMENT. I'LL
> BE RIGHT BACK."
>
> "OK." I NERVOUSLY REPLIED.
>
> SHE WENT INTO THE BEDROOM AND, AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES, SHE CAME OUT
> CARRYING A HUGE BIRTHDAY CAKE... FOLLOWED BY MY WIFE, KIDS, AND DOZENS
> OF MY FRIENDS AND CO-WORKERS, ALL SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".
>
> AND I JUST SAT THERE...
>
> ON THE COUCH...
>
> NAKED.
Did you need an archaeologist to dig that one up?
SteveH
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